This Grand Adventure Called Life

Warning: This is the longest blog post of my life (or at least it took me the longest to write, seeing as I started writing it in May)....prepare yourself now because this could be rough.  

I started this blog post a  few months ago but things happened so fast I couldn’t seem to keep up with my life.  Hopefully, I can sum it all up now before the next life adventures begin.  

For the most part, my life was/is pretty boring. Not a whole lot going on, ever. 

This past year and a half is an exception. I graduated from nursing school, moved to Minnesota to start work as an RN,  had open heart surgery, moved back to Utah, and started work as an RN Primary Children’s Medical Center on the Neuroscience Trauma Unit.  Makes me tired just typing it all.  

Let’s rewind a bit to when I started typing this up…My amazing little sister (mentioned in a previous post) is serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  She is in the Manchester, New Hampshire Mission.  Here is a link to her blog if you ever want to check it out.    

http://mysistermissionary.blogspot.com/ 

In order to spend some time with her before she left I got some time off work and headed to Utah.  I was only able to stay for a week, but we had a wonderful time. We toured Sweets Candy Factory,  ran a 5K, went to Super Pump classes, went to Mission Prep classes together, built an awesome fort, went shopping, ate yummy food, got family pictures taken, took a few naps, cut Elaine’s hair, tried out the XBOX Kinect, ate our last meal at Wendy’s and had to say goodbye for the next 18 months.  It was a long and emotional, but wonderful week.  

First major-ish run since surgery.....5K in the pouring rain. AMAZING

Pretty much the coolest blanket fort EVER

Elaine asked for a haircut......

The week turned out to be even more adventurous than expected when I got a call from the float pool manager at Primary Children’s Medical Center.  I’ve been applying there for so long and never expected anything to happen until I had a full year of nursing experience, so the call came as quite a surprise.  I got an interview with them and with a few phone calls was able to get an interview for the Neuroscience Trauma Unit (NTU) at Primary Children’s as well.  

I had these interviews the day before I left.  I felt pretty good about how the interviews went, and although the NTU  was/is my dream job, I didn’t expect to get an offer and didn’t plan on taking it unless they would be willing to wait until I finished my year here at Mayo.  

All of those thoughts went completely out the window when I got a phone call the next day and was extended a job offer to work on the NTU! Pretty sure I almost peeped my pants Don’t worry mom, I wasn’t on the fourth wheeler ;-) 

Although I wasn’t planning on taking the job (because I knew they wouldn’t wait until I finished my year) I couldn’t say no.  This truly is my dream job.  I been working in neuro for a few years and have always dreamed of working at Primary Children’s.  I am so grateful that although it took a few unexpected twists and turns to get there, God has led me not only to where I need to be, but where I want to be. 

That news changed everything. I didn’t dread leaving my family and heading back to MN because I knew in a month I would be back home.  I was so happy and amazed at how things worked out so perfectly.  Not only in this instance, but they have workout out perfectly throughout my whole life.  I know that I am being watched over and directed where I need to go. 

Hanging out at Wendy's eating our last meal together for the next 18 months!

The HARDEST goodbye!

Shortly after getting back to MN I celebrated my 6 month surgiversary (now coming up on 9 months in Sept.)! I cannot believe it has already been that long.  Wilbur (or at least a small part of him) is holding up well.  I truly feel better than I have in a long time. I actually feel wake when I get up; I have so much more energy to exercise (not that I've been doing much of that lately); and while I always love a good nap, I am taking a whole lot less of them.   To celebrate the special day Ashley and I grilled up some steaks and cooked some chicken Rice-a-Roni (I decided to abstain from pork products, given the occasion).  They were mighty delicious! Sadly we both had to work, so it was a pretty low key celebration. 

I tried my best  to live it up with my favorite roommate ever, Miss Ashley Ann Langford, before I headed home. I knew the day would come when we would no longer be roommates, but never did I expect it to some so quickly.  We grilled steaks quite frequently to celebrate our last few weeks together. We also had few birthday parties (both for me).  I miss her so very much! I will always cherish the time we spent together and am hoping for many more adventures with my 'sista wife fo life'.

 

Birthday Party at 1 AM. Best surprise ever after a LONG night at work

Some amazing photos from a CRAZY lightening storm

Perfect timing

First of many rest stops on our journey to the West

Ashely and her BIG buddy! 64 oz doesn't even phase her

Cones  and crowns from BK

While figuring out moving my stuff, wrapping things up at my current job, and getting things ready for my new job, it came time for my Sister Dixon to report to the MTC.  I knew the day would come, but never wanted to say that goodbye. I was able to FaceTime with her as they dropped her off and she started her wonderful mission experience. 

I am so proud of her for this decision and for the type of person she is to be able to do this.  She is my best friend and I love her more than she will ever know. She is definitely the most loving, sweet, and pure person you will ever meet. She has been doing great and gives me so much strength with her emails and the testimony she shares. If you want to follow her mission adventures here is (another) link to her blog. She writes some great letters that are sure to inspire.

http://mysistermissionary.blogspot.com/ 

Can't help but smile when I see my beautiful sister

I have now been working at Primary Children's for 2 months and I love it so so much! I have SOOOO much to learn, but I can honestly say I love going to work.  It seems like things have finally started to slow down a bit, which I am kind of enjoying.  I am sure it won't last too long.

In all that has happened this last year, I have truly come to know that God is watching over each of us. There is no way I could deny that after the experiences I have had.  Every moment of every day he making things happen in our behalf.  He cares about us and blesses our lives in so many ways (often unrecognized). I didn’t always have the best attitude about going to MN, but I am forever grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who knows exactly what I need in my life and finds a way to offer it to me. I am far from deserving, but very grateful for the direction and guidance I’ve been given. I don’t think I will ever be able to truly express how grateful I am for all that happened this last year and all those who helped me through it. 

I look forward to this next year of my life and am excited to see what is in store for me.  I don’t know what could compare to the adventures I had this last year, but I guess we will have to wait and find out. 

Reality Check: Life goes on

I would like dedicate this blog post to my Aunt Laurie (sorry it took so long),

First off, where in the heck did January and February go?!? I feel like I’ve been in a time warp.  The past few months have flown by way too fast, but they were definitely a wonderful few months!

My trip home seems like it was ages ago and just yesterday at the same time.  I made it home to Utah Dec. 18^th.  It was so so so wonderful to be there. It was weird because it felt like I never left. Like my life in MN and everything that had happened out here was a dream. I was back at home, such a comforting and happy place.  It was exciting to see family, friends, and neighbors that I hadn’t seen in what seemed like forever.  Most of my time home was spent hanging out with family and friends, shopping, and eating lots and lots of good food. All necessary things for a good recovery.  I did have to squeeze in cardiac rehab weekday mornings and weekly blood tests to make sure my rat poison (Coumadin) was keeping my blood nice and thin. Many thanks to my chauffeurs who took me to all these wonderful appointments and everywhere else I needed to go. You know who you are!

Life was interesting following my surgery. What I had gone through hadn’t fully hit me. I felt very good, given the circumstances, and wanted to live my life as a ‘normal’ person, (whatever that is supposed to mean).  I found myself frustrated with the fact that I couldn’t drive, I couldn’t shouldn’t lift things. I felt pretty much useless when things needed to be done. It was hard to be so dependent and unable to help yourself or those around you.   

It was definitely a learning experience and I hope I can remember the things I learned for heart surgery round 2, whenever that happens. I learned a lot (and continue to learn a lot) of patience, especially with myself.

I learned : 

• sometimes being strong means accepting your weaknesses- (still a work in progress).
• I am one very very lucky and loved individual.
• I have such an amazing group of family and friends who support me and continue to do so much for me! Please forgive me for not thanking you more and being more appreciative while I was home.  I wouldn’t have made it through without you all.
• that getting frustrated by those who are trying to help is ridiculous because they are doing it because they love you so much.
• even if you don’t want help, you probably need it.
• If you feel babied or overly worried about, its because people love you. 
• to be patient with others because even if you (thought you) felt ok with all that had happened, that wasn’t always the case for everyone else. 
• that walking on a treadmill can be very very hard work, even if its only for a few minutes and a slow speed.
• recovery takes time, like so many things in life. You have to work for it and wait for it and you can’t get something for nothing.
• I love Hawaiian food and malasadas, (thanks Elaine)!
• that you can NEVER have too much Cafe Rio.

It has been a month since I started writing this post, (oops), and I continue to add more to the list of wonderful things I am learning. It sure is amazing how God knows exactly what ways you need to learn and grow and knows exactly what will help you accomplish that.

Physically, I am doing so well now.  I started off walking on a treadmill for 6 minutes at a slow speed. There were many days when I wondered if I would ever get better and if I would ever be able to handle exercise like I did before.  I am so happy to say that with time, that does come back.  I have continued to attend cardiac rehab and am now walking on a 15% incline, 3.5-4 mph, and for 35 min.  I also ran a mile for the first time a few days ago, which was great considering a few weeks ago slowly jogging for 3 min nearly did me in.  I feel so much stronger now and can really tell that this surgery has helped me out a lot, in ways I never knew I needed.

Ok, back to my trip to UTAH!!!...

I had a wonderful Christmas with my family! I am so happy I was able to spend time with them at Grandma’s house! I would have been really sad if I had to miss that wonderful holiday tradition. I also had fantastic new years with my dad’s side of the family and was so glad I was able to party it up with Phil and Carolyn when their family came to town. 

For the most part, life was wonderful. I didn’t have to work and I was having such a good time being with the people I loved. I never wanted it to end! I had this secret hope that somehow, some way, I wouldn’t have to move back to MN, that I would be able to stay in Utah.  As my departure date got closer and closer that fantasy became less and less real until I was packing up my bags to head on my way.  I’m not going to lie, I wasn’t very happy about it at all. Hurray for my angel Ashley who had a flight to back to MN with me.  My mom put her in charge of keeping me from going AWOL. 

The first few weeks back were rough. I didn’t want to be here! I didn’t have any work yet, I didn’t want to do anything but go back to Utah and be with the people I loved, (not that I don’t love people out here because I do).  As time has gone on, things have been getting better and better. I am working at the clinic building downtown scanning papers into the computer so they have an electronic copy of research information. I recently graduated from scanning and get to do some data entry too….yahoo!   It doesn’t sound all that fun, and its not, but despite not wanting to go back to work I am so glad I was able to.  It makes a huge difference to actually feel like you are contributing to something in life.

I guess I hoped for a lot of things to change with this heart surgery deal. Mostly selective changes, though.  Even thought I wanted to live like a ‘normal’ person, how could life just continue as it had before?  How could I just go back to the daily grind, as if nothing happened? I found myself almost wanting to be sick again so I didn’t have to go back to that reality. Although a lot of my day to day activities haven’t changed, I have and continue to change because of what I went through. I hope these changes are for the better.

It is finally all starting to hit me now… I never thought it would.  I had open heart surgery!!!! I am not the same as I used to be. This will be a part of who I am for the rest of my life. I am not sure in what ways it will affect me most.  Along with the physical changes, I hope that this has brought about some overall life changes as well. Life is so precious, and I am so grateful for the perfect timing of all these events in my life. I am grateful that I was here in MN, with such a wonderful roommate and the best doctors and surgeons in the world. I am so so blessed and need to be better about continually recognizing that and letting others know when they bless my life, because so many people do.  I have finally realized accepted that yes, major surgery and recovery is hard (both physically and emotionally). I also realize that so many others deal with a lot more difficult stuff than what I went through and handle it so much better than I ever could.  Those people are heroes to me!

On a completely unrelated note, my favorite sister is going on a mission! She has been called as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and will be spending 18 months in the Manchester, New Hampshire mission.  She is one amazing gal and I am privileged to be her sister.  She has always been a wonderful example and even if she wasn’t taller than me, I would still look up to her so much! She is so strong, diligent, and has a spirit about her that cannot be ignored. Those people in New Hampshire should, in the words of Sister Dixon herself, 'consider themselves grateful' that she is headed their way! Sure love ya, Skip!